There is much to be said about the ritual of preparing a good cup of coffee, and yet so much is clouded by superstitious claptrap that really doesn’t have any effect on what the final cup tastes like. There are those that believe what counts is simple math and physics, and as long as you understand the chemistry of coffee you can produce a perfect cup every time.

To quote the logician from Monty Python and the Holy Grail… “I think it is crap and it gets me very irritated!”

Sure maths and physics come into it, but that makes coffee, passion and care makes The Perfect Cup Of Coffee!

Now one fine day you will find yourself sitting accross the table from some bohemian half wit who will profess to know all there is to know about coffee and from his lips shall spew such pearls as…

“Rinse paper filters in hot water to keep their ‘papery’ taste from getting in your coffee.”

To which you can answer… “Perhaps if you bought real unbleached coffee filters instead of stuffing cheap paper napkins into the machine then you wouldn’t have this problem.”

“Add a few tiny crystals of salt, no more than about 7 or 8, to the top of your grounds before brewing. It neutralizes the acidity.”

Your reply… “Listen you retard who can’t follow simple instructions. The acidity wouldn’t be there if you didn’t buy cheap coffee and over-extract it, you fool”

“Always keep your beans in the freezer to preserve their freshness.”

Shout this out loudly at the top of your voice… “This is WRONG! You are a RETARD! This destroys the OILS! Anybody with half a friggin brain knows you should keep them at ABOVE FREEZING in a dark and airtight container!”

At this point, reach across, punch them in the mouth and leave! No wait this is your coffee shop… throw them out!